Parenting is not an easy task. The best example to explain this would be, think of it like training your pet for 5-6 years and making them learn how to speak and write and understand and what not. It is more than, do a handshake and while some have excelled it, there are some who have the most badass and savage kids ever.
A kid’s mind is tricky, it can think about anything and everything in the most absurd and weird way possible. You would have to answer ‘Out of the World’ questions, which might not even make sense but this is parenting. However, at times you also have fun because kids are cute and they say the weirdest stuff ever.
This includes some of the hilarious tweets ever, so here are the best tweets posted by parents from all around the world.
Me to my son: You remind me of me.
Son: That's just mean.— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) August 16, 2016
https://twitter.com/TheMichaelRock/status/697063892501942278
Daughter: You're invading my personal space
Mom: You came out of my personal space
— Moe (@_Mo_lee_) January 8, 2016
[looking up at the night sky]
Me: You can make a wish on any star you want.
5-year-old: Which one is the Death Star?
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 9, 2016
[At dinner]
Daughter: Daddy, how much of this meatball is meat?
Me: Probably like 90%
D: So it's 10% balls?
Me: *spits out food*— Tim (@Playing_Dad) January 3, 2016
My daughters took turns tracing each other over and over with chalk.
Now it looks like 25 children were murdered in my driveway.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) June 29, 2016
Me: I think I ate too much.
4yo: Yeah, but not just today.— Aaron Aryanpur (@aaroncomedian) November 26, 2016
My 2-year-old handed me a candy bar.
I hugged her for finally learning how to share.
Turns out she just wanted me to open it.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 8, 2016
[two of my four kids burst into tears]
Random lady walking by: Why are you crying, girls?
Me: It's cute that you think there's a reason.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) May 25, 2016
I don't care how cute your kid is. When you wake up in the middle of the night and see them standing next to your bed, they are terrifying.
— Wendy S. (@maughammom) August 1, 2016
My youngest is being tested for the gifted program at his elementary school and my other son thinks his toothbrush is haunted.
— EEEric (@ericsshadow) March 25, 2016
Me: Get out of bed.
4-year-old: No!
Me: Why do you fight me every single morning?
4: Because you never learn.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) August 24, 2016
I lead the after-school drama club at my kid's school. A 1st gr said, "Can you teach me how to act like I'm listening when my dad talks?"
— Danielle Herzog (@daniellemherzog) February 1, 2016
When I want my kids to eat something the best chance I have is to put it on MY plate, where apparently food becomes immediately appetizing.
— Jennifer S. White (@yenniwhite) August 15, 2016
I tell my kids that it's important to learn pointless algebra because someday they may have to help their kids learn pointless algebra.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) July 28, 2016
My son was crying and asked, "why doesn't the dog have to wear pants?" And it's like, I don't even know. So now I'm putting pants on a dog.
— ally (@TragicAllyHere) September 30, 2016
My kids wanted to know what it's like to be a Mom so I woke them up at 2am to let them know my sock came off.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) May 10, 2016
My 11yo wrote me an apology for misbehaving in the car that included "I love you so much but sometimes forget to care about your existence."
— Amanda Mancino-Williams (@Manda_like_wine) April 27, 2016
Kids' ears are amazing. It takes 7 times to hear "Pick up that toy" yet they can hear a bag of chips open at 50 yards.
— Beau Coffron (@lunchboxdad) May 30, 2016
6: Daddy, I'm mad at you.
Me: What for?
6: I'm not telling you.She's already a woman.
— Rich Cromwell (@rcromwell4) March 3, 2016
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20 December 2016
Jyotsna Amla