Security and Criticism – Two Opposite Doors That Can Either Make You or Break You

We all would be well versed with members of our family or our peers telling us to keep doors that are opposite to each other, simultaneously open on a hot sultry day to aid good cross ventilation.

A favourable way to kill the humidity, isn’t it?

Now indulge me for a moment and imagine there are two doors in front of you albeit of a different kind.

One of security and the other of criticism.

If I ask you to open the door of security and criticism simultaneously to aid cross ventilation of emotions, would you truly breathe an air of security devoid of criticism?

Confused?

Let me explain.

If in your work or in life you undertake a task and are comforted by a self-created blanket of security while performing it, when criticism comes your way it shouldn’t matter, right?

Unfortunately, it does. Most times.

The C-word does get the better of us and our emotions.

We react negatively to criticism despite thinking we are not affected by the virus of insecurity.

It has happened to me throughout my 12 years of Advertising and Communication, where I thought I was more than secure in my job, with the role I undertook albeit when someone criticised me, be it my boss, peers or clients, it devasted me.

I would start defending myself rather than taking their criticism constructively to make me a more rounded individual.

Why was that? Was I really secure?

Well, the answer was an earth-shattering NO.

After taking a break from Advertising, pre-inception of the lockdown last year, and starting my next chapter in sports writing, I realised this.

Even initially in writing when I faced criticism despite thinking I have done a fine job on a piece, I would feel why is this person being so negative.

Also Read: Why Do We Cry?

Having said this, in the last one year while pursuing my passion for writing despite facing criticism at times, I have come to realise there are two kinds of critics:

1. People who criticise with the intent of genuinely wanting you to grow and do better. I call them the propagators of constructive criticism.
2. People who in the true sense of the word are insecure about themselves and hence make criticism their weapon of choice to demean others. I call them the shallows of destructive criticism.

Obviously, it’s the latter we shouldn’t be faced with.

Yes, have had my own challenges to reach the stage of not being affected by the latter and it’s taken time.

That said, today with my head held high I can proudly claim to have opened the door of security and criticism simultaneously and the air I breathe is one of positivity.

I have eradicated the virus of destructive criticism with the vaccine of true security.

Also Read: Suffering From FOMO? Here’s All You Need To Know About Fear Of Missing Out

It’s possible, one just has to believe and work on it!

The question that remains, are you comfortable opening both these doors together and still not be broken?